Sunday, September 07, 2008

Sarah has style

Hillary dressed for success but Sarah, Sarah is just Sarah. Man, I love her style. Apparently I'm not the only one. She's got it goin' on! The L.A. Times has an article about how sales for her eyeglass style has gone out of sight. (It's light reading, not all political.) I have to try to get my hair to pouf up like hers! Don't know if I can bear another 60 days till election day. I told myself I wouldn't read any more articles because I'm set on who I'm going to vote for. There was a window of time when I thought Obama might be it, but I really like Sarah now so I'm voting for McCain. I see that today Obama made a speaking error and referred to "his Muslim faith."

Since we watched Sarah's speech online with streaming media we went over our quota for downloading bandwidth and we were penalized. Our connection was slower than dial-up for the next 24 hours. It took five minutes for my Hotmail to download and that didn't even count opening an email.

Next day we took my sewing machine in for repair. The good news is, my husband told me to pick out a BRAND NEW machine. I was stoked. I picked a Bernina computerized machine, the Activa 220, all I could ever want or need. Bernina is like the Rolls Royce of sewing machines.

Bad news was I got it home and it had a clackety sound. That would be about a thousand dollar clackety sound. Long story short, I took it back the following day and got a (very highly stressful) complete refund. It amounts to two entire days spent driving back and forth to the city. The store owners were duperly nice the whole time but I still felt very uncomfortable and bad about the whole thing. My husband dropped me off and left because he hates these kinds of situations as much or more than I do. I now have my still broken sewing machine back. Tuesday I'm taking it to a little repair shop in town to hopefully get it fixed. When I get it back I can begin sewing again on my baby hearts quilt, if the top of my head hasn't exploded off by then.

I miss homeschooling. This break is not really good for me. I am a little lost because my main life focus is the homeschooling. I am doing belly dancing twice a week and can feel already that my body is responding. I feel better all over physically yet rather ho-hum mentally.

Which reminds me, I told my belly dance teacher that I will not be doing any more performance for mixed gender audiences. I told her female audiences only. She doesn't understand it. She is kind but I can tell she just doesn't get it. She asked me twice, why? I gave her the long explanation the first time then told her the second time that the Lord convicted my heart about it and I cannot ignore it. It's true. I am so sure about it I cannot ignore it. She explained that she grew up in a fundamentalist family (I suspect someone told her I am a fundamentalist because I, myself, have never discussed it with her) and that belly dance is all through the Bible and that David danced before the Lord. Yeah, but I'll tell you what, we have no record of how they danced and I honestly don't think David was doing umis (oo-meez) and camels and snake arms. I just don't see it. I didn't say that to her though.

Did I already write about how the Lord convicted my heart? Well, it first happened before I actually danced and I was a dresser in 2004. While I was in the audience watching for a while I overhead some young men and the things they were saying. It wasn't nice. They said, "Look at all the ***** up there." I was so sad because to me the dancing was ever so opulent and altogether gorgeous. The ladies were wearing their best costumes, hundreds of dollars spent on each, and they did their hair, pretty make-up, and practiced the choreography so diligently. They were so shapely and in shape. Essentially, I overlooked the incident and continued because I, Liliana, wanted to pursue performance. But last year a thing happened that got my attention again. It was the night that I performed badly (bummer!) but two of the other dancers, female, kissed, as part of the performance. One girl was on her knees. It was not good. To them it was nothing. To me, God said it was wrong. Still I didn't take action immediately because I didn't want to stop performing.

I did continue to feel sick at heart about it though. So I thought about it. I read my Bible to see what it said about my predicament. The Bible is God's Word so it addresses everything under the sun. Then I wrote for advice. I came to the conclusion that 1Thessalonians 5:22 We should abstain from the appearance of evil summed it up for me. The dance itself is not evil or bad, but participating in it will damage my witness. And even though the pretty costumes and the serpentine, suggestive movements, are not implicitly sexual to me, to the eyes of men it's not a big stretch to say the dance is quite sensuous in nature and it could stumble them, poor pitiful creatures that they are. (Hehe, I'm half kidding there.) Well, it doesn't stumble me in the least but I should not think only of myself.

Add to this that my teacher said when they danced downtown last month the audience got very loud and raucous, and I am sure I made a decision pleasing to the Lord.

But then listen to this. I showed her my choreography that I learned in San Diego. She loved it and asked if I will teach it to her. Sure, I said. And then she commented that she was surprised that I would dance to that music. The intro is very mysterious and rather ominous. What? What! I didn't know what to think. I'm attentive and do not dance or listen to music with ungodly lyrics, but what's wrong with a windy sounding creaks and bumps in the night musical intro? I should live in a box and only listen to happy pappy poppy tunes? I was annoyed.

Also! When I told her I will be more traditional as they are in the Middle East today, and dance this dance only with women she raised her eyebrows and said, "And what about the women who watch you dance?" The implication being that perhaps the women would have h*m*s*x**l thoughts. She's definitely messing with me now, I think. Was she making fun of me? But also, I am not sure what to think. I hadn't thought of that. It again made me heartsick that something I love to do is like this now. On the other hand, it may be a non-issue. I don't know that any woman only opportunities will come along. I will just go to classes and dance for myself. I spent kind of a lot of money on my costumes though. Too bad for that.

I'm done writing now. :) If any godly women reading this have thoughts, please do feel free to tell me. I need to hear.

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