Rock House

There was no pecan harvesting yesterday because the orchard owners had a medical emergency. We will go in January. So instead we went to the ranch (saw the horses below and our son got to ride one) and then we ventured out to a place I've never been before called Rock House.

There's not much out there except the endless miles of the very striking Chihuahuan desert. You know, I thought we were in the Sonoran desert until I watched a ranger presentation a couple weeks ago and I found out I'm not in the Sonoran desert. I'm in the Chihuahuan desert. Hhmmph.

My friend said he wants to camp out there a couple nights when it warms up, but I tell ya, I'm a fraidy cat. Maybe if I'm with a ranger or someone who has a weapon for protection, but I don't know about staying out there alone. My friend the journalist, he's up for it though. He's got a wild side.

So can you see Rock House? It's that leetle, tiny, house made of, um, rocks, on the left, that blends in with the desert. It was hard for us to see and we were driving there. It's 17 miles off the interstate. No one knows who owned it. Even the historical society doesn't know who built it or who lived in it. That's a bit peculiar. The desert can be a peculiar place.

And here's a shot of the house. This is its best side. The inside was no great shakes. I can't imagine who could have lived out there.

Here's a silhouette of a pecan tree. It was a cloudy morning in the 40s. Shiver-me-burrrsky cold! I had on a big warm coat. My husband picks good coats. Although it was cold at Rock House too, at least it was mostly sunny.

Meow

Kitty cat face. I love kitty cat faces. She's the friendliest little thing.

The nerve

Is he sticking his tongue out? Well, I never!

Divot in my head

Ooooh, so I worked out yesterday and practiced with my scimitar. I didn't drop it. I haven't dropped it yet. I just move soooo slowly with it. I put a cork from a bottle of wine on the end of it so if, that is to say when, I drop it it should be a little safer. Logically speaking.

And I noticed after ten minutes I had a pretty big divot on the top of my head where the sword sat. Haha! That could be good, right? Long as it's not permanent!

Tomorrow I get to go with a journalist to see pecans being harvested. That should be pretty neat. I guess they use a machine that shakes the trees a lot.

Is anybody up

Well, I am. I'd like to go to sleep, but same old, same old.

I hit 40.5 this week. Not bad. It means I'm on track and that's good. I'm really content with the length. I've been wearing it in a French twist the last two days. I like that when I take it down I can smell the shampoo still and it has a nice fragrance. The new shampoo (Garnier Fructis) and V05 creme rinse are super slick. They even make the bathtub slick. Giovanni has cones but not that much! My hair was a dream to comb out. Practically effortless. Guess I'll just keep an eye on it and see how it fares. Maybe I'll go make up some nice hair dreams and put myself to sleep.

I haven't been working out for a week. Gotta get back on track with working out tomorrow.

Tags

I got another email about how popular the blankets were and how everybody enjoyed the tags! These were the tags.

I hope everyone had a loverly day today!

Merry Christmas to you!

That's what my husband just said to me and I pass it on. I was awake so I got out of bed. Went to the hiding place which must remain unnamed and got the two gifts from Santa. Son is dead asleep. A bomb could drop on the trailie and he'd sleep through it. He's been so excited today that he tired himself out. He did the dinner dishes for me tonight. He did the morning dishes too, and vacuumed. Crazy kid.

As I walked to the truck I looked up and what did I see - a constellation I'm always looking for and can never find - the Big Dipper. It is glorious. So clear out tonight. Saw Mars earlier too.

Jesus is the light of the world.

Dad called me. Everyone is over there. The mothers liked the blankies I made for their babies. My sister said they looked perfect. She exaggerates though. One baby is sick at home though so he wasn't there. He was home with his daddy. The hat fit the new baby girl. I feel happy that I did handmade gifts for them.

At this time of year and at Easter, these are the two times I feel a deep and abiding affection and connection with all the world. It's like a glow within and without.

Fifteen years ago the holiday was quite a big 'to do.' I don't want to say how much money we spent. Oh how I could have spent it better! How much of that stuff is at the dump now, returned to Mother Earth? The boxes, the bows, the tape, the tissue, the gift wrap, the shoes, the special outfits, the many mall purchased objects. I don't know. As a child, for me the celebration was strictly secular. Much is lost if you celebrate in a secular way. It's like an awesome shuffle of material goods with the most shuffling among the wealthy, a middle amount in the middle class, and a wee bit or none among the poor. These are things which do not satisfy. Makes the heart ache when people are alone after the celebrating. It's too much, too big, all wrong.

So now we do it small. I will miss Advent. It was fun this year. We tried to sing "Hark the Herald Angels" tonight but we can't hold the melody after the first stanza. I quit singing, but my husband went with it the whole way through. It was pretty bad. Haha!

Two thousand and seven years ago, well, thereabouts anyways, a baby boy was born... Even the people who have no faith agree He was here. It's been established and was written about by the historian, Josephus.

Next comes the New Year.

(P.S. - My sister emailed that the blankets were a SMASH, so now I'm even happier!)

It's Christmas Eve

Son has been antsy all day. He's excited about opening presents tomorrow. He completed almost ten pages of vocabulary independently before I even got out of bed. I was up late, so I slept till ten. Yesterday he peeled an orange for himself and at dinner he insisted on serving himself his own soup. He's sure growing up.

My sewing machine is in for repair, so I couldn't finish our son's blanket. I'm bummed, but happy that it will be fixed. I will just have to finish the blanket when it's back from the repair shop. It started skipping stitches. Maybe next year, if I sew much, I can get a computerized machine. They're supposed to have very even, consistent stitches, moreso than a mechanical machine. I loved my mom's Singer machine. But Singers of today are not the same as those of yesteryear. I learned to sew on it when I was in eighth grade. I sewed a really pretty halter dress and a gorgeous spring dress from my friend's wedding. My machine is a Brother and I'm not crazy about it. It's frustrating that little things go wrong and I have to fight with it a lot.

Guess I'll go get cleaned up and wash my hair so it'll be fresh for Christmas Day. It's 4:05pm. Shall I get out of my pajamas?

Calendar nearly done

I've spent the week-end at my computer...working on my 2008 calendar at Shutterfly. It should be pretty good if it turns out like it's supposed to.

dailycoyote.net

Are you needing some good pictures to look at today?

http://www.dailycoyote.net/

Parenting is good

Sometimes I want to throttle him - like right now - as he purposely drags in feet through vocabulary. But Wednesday was different. He received an award. We didn't know it was coming. Nobody told us!

We were at the Christmas potluck. The first award went to two men, a ranger and a volunteer, who saved seven people from drowning in the lake last summer. The superintendent read the official report which was rather dry. He then shared with us the details that weren't included in the report. The boat had overturned. One adult and a child were still in the boat though it was barely above water and sinking quickly. The rest were in the water. The winds were blowing the tiny vessel and the people onto dangerous rocks that are in that area. It was during a storm. The lake can be mean during a storm. Did I mention it was at night? It was dark. Dark night. Have you walked along the beach in the dark of night? Even though you're safe onshore it's scary when you can hear the water, but you can't see it. It strikes a chord of preternatural fear in the human heart.

By the grace of God, the boating officer on duty had only minutes before taken on a long time volunteer on board who offered to patrol the lake with him. Without this volunteer who was highly experienced on the water, a single man would have had great difficulty doing the rescue and maneuvering the boat at the same time. So the call came in, S.O.S, precise location, and they rode full speed to that place on the lake. The eight year old girl was screaming hysterically. The others, those in the water, this is not in the report, were giving each other last rites in the water. They thought they were checking out of this world.

Our New Mexico Boating Officer and the other a long time volunteer, saved all seven people one at a time. That's a story with an awesome ending and that's what their award was for. Sometimes the rangers pull dead people out of the water which as you can imagine is traumatic. The rangers have to deal with it in their mind and heart afterwards and it's not an easy thing. It happens in a lake this big. Last year a 15 year old boy drowned in the lake. The rangers save lives when they can. They're trained to do so. But when they can't save a life the repercussions are real.

The second award went to our ten year old son. The badge in the frame is an official one. Normally, men and women must graduate from the police academy and work in law enforcement to receive this badge. It is an true honor to have this badge! Our son is not allowed to wear it, it would be unlawful, but he can display it. The super went all the way to the top to get approval for this. As far as we know he is the youngest volunteer in New Mexico, and the only Honorary Ranger in the state. He was bustin' with pride. We were too.

Yesterday at the school where he takes a class he gave a presentation about his award. It's his first presentation in front of anyone other than family. He did pretty well! This I love about home education.

Me, as a kid I dreaded "Sharing Time" or "Current Events" at school. I still get a sick feeling in the pit of my stomach about Newsweek magazine because my mom had it delivered to our house so I could pick out news items for school sharing. Our son on the other hand informed me he was doing a presentation about his award the next day at school. Just like that. He practiced on us that evening and did it Thursday. Wow. And he showed off the plaque, a letter they wrote him last year selecting him as a volunteer, his official volunteer card, and he defined the word 'honorary' (that was his idea) and showed off the flyers and spreadsheets he created on his computer as part of his job.

I'm kind of proud of him.

Picked a gift

I was stressing out about what to get a little girl. Naturally, but naturally, I've left it to the last minute. We got her a coat that I absolutely loved last year, but found out later it was a size too big. It took me all of three minutes to select that coat. It's like from the '70s, a very cute coat. Anywho, this year I picked for her a ballerina jewelry box from Nordstrom. Why didn't I just go to Nordstrom's in the first place? Every little girl should have a ballerina jewelry box. My grama gave one each to my sister and me when I was ten and my sis was six. I really liked it. Here it is:

I searched high and low online for genie pajamas but genie pajamas could not be found. I got a a pair for Christmas when I was a kid and they were really pretty. I also had some fancy lacy pajamas that were a gift so I also just searched for feminine pj's. Man, there are a lot of flannel, cotton, utilitarian fugly plain pj's to be had, but not much on the luxurious side. There should be. Dora the Explorer and cartoon pajamas? I don't think so. A girl deserves some genuine wholesome girly loungewear.

My mom finished a genealogy book about my grandmother's life and sent me a copy. It's awesome. She must have spent a few hundred hours compiling information. My people are from Ireland. Came over during the potato famine. Pioneers they were. Real pioneers in the mid-west. Back then there was right and there was wrong and not much in between. You didn't get coddled for having anxiety attacks or wanting everyone to support your alternative lifestyle. Time was not allotted for things that don't matter. Life is so precious. Too precious to be frittered away on self. I must remind myself of that next time I can't sleep.

I miss my grama

GRAMA! I miss you tonight.

America is great because she is good. If America ceases to be good, America will cease to be great. -Alexis de Tocqueville

It's been rumbling around in my mind. I think it's true.

My husband came to church today and remarked on how good the pastor is. This pastor should be in a metropolitan area. I can't believe I found him in a town of 7,000.

I don't know if he'll come to church again. I can't nag him. There's a line between nagging and asking. The pastor is so articulate I don't know how he can not want to go back. But I always get to church late (at least I'm consistent?) and my husband is a very timely person. He even wants to go to parties, well, actually nowadays I'd say "get-togethers" on time and I tell him it's very uncool to be right on time. So since he came today we were on time and the talking, it's called fellowship, is too much for me. Now I can't sleep. Guess I should go read something.

For evening study, this is the first time in awhile that I was completely lost. I didn't follow much of the teaching. It was about Jesus and David and the lineage. Quite confusing if you don't get it. And a guy whose name starts with M who was Jesus incarnate or something. I need my notes, but it's dark right now so I'm just blathering. I'm fascinated by what I didn't understand though. Can't wait to read through my notes.

My hair. My husband ran into one that was across the doorway somehow and he thought it was a spiderweb. Then he sat in the chair and pulled a long one off of the chair. I might need to vacuum this place. More frequently it's getting caught in a screw that is in the wall behind me in the bathroom. I'm needing more elbow room lately.

Which reminds me. Tonight I saw a group photo of my graduating class (1977) from the reunion in October. Talk about disillusioned. Thought I was going to have a heart attack. Does 48 look that old? It does. Sadly, it does. You can't stay young forever. And I recall that at the Luminaria a kid about 17 years old called me Ma'am. Brutal. I am so crying in my soup tonight. Not that I want to be 17. Far from it. But I wouldn't mind 27. Shoot, I wouldn't mind 37. I wouldn't mind 41, 42, 43, 44, 45, or 46. Sigh.

The other day I was looking for a word. I hate it when I need a word and I can't think of it. It's like I can feel the word but I can't find it. I have to settle for some one or two syllable word that's not as descriptive. Anyway, it was anecdotal. What was it I was writing that I needed it for now? Hmmmm. Can't remember. Ha! Small annoyances never end.

Ready to mail

Finished the tags (that only took three and a half hours due to printer challenges), attached them to blankets, gift wrapped three blankets, made chicken soup. That was my day. And it was a long day.

We fasted, but it wasn't difficult. Next time we're going to do water only fasting from sun up to sun down.

My sewing machine isn't working very well and I have two rice bags to make. The stitch length regulator is messed up. Then after dinner I guess I was too tired and I forgot to turn the seams to the INside. Duh. Had to toss it and will try again tomorrow. Fresh.

I am hoping my husband will come to church tomorrow morning. Only our son can convince him to come. This week-end and next he's not working. Those are our two chances.

Girl's blanket done

It's sweet! Of the three I made I'm the least happy with how the binding came out on this one, but I'm packaging her up and sending tomorrow. I even got wild and made a little matching tie top cap to go with it. The satin feels wonnnnderful. I washed it because it's flannel backed for extra warmth and I expected the flannel might shrink. I ironed the satin to make it look brand new, but it came out of the wash nicely enough and I'm glad about that. I was a little worried it would wrinkle terribly, but it didn't.

I get an achy back from cutting on the floor, so my back hurts. I took a couple ibu but they don't work fast enough for me!

Have a good week-end my friend!

My dear ballet teacher

I asked her why she was so stressed. Being the Christmas season I fully expected she'd let loose with a litany of Christmas errands; shopping, wrapping, cooking, crafting, etcetera. But no. She said only a few people know...two weeks ago her husband called her on the phone at work and asked for a divorce. He left her, as in went away. She is a good woman I think. She's petite and blonde haired, blue-eyed. We talked for about 20 minutes. I almost cried full on twice and she didn't. She has too much to deal with to have time for tears. Her vehicle insurance lapsed because he didn't pay it. She didn't know how to open the top on the truck to put in the anti-freeze. She told me what happened to her water well and I didn't understand what she said (as I nodded my head) but she had to turn off the water. She has no water in her home. She's living my nightmare. Every woman's nightmare, yes? Life as we know it is tenuous.

I gave her my phone number. She works during the day and teaches dance at night. Some days she doesn't return home till 10:00pm. There but for the grace of God go I.

She apologized for sharing all her troubles and I told her, don't be, I have strong shoulders. It was a little bit of a lie, but I want it to be true. I pray the Lord will give me half a brain to be a good friend she can lean on if she needs.

Gotta git in gear

I want to mail off the baby gifts on the 15th. I still have the girl blanket to sew though. I have all the stuff out. Here it is right beside me; I just have to DO it. I did sew a fleece baby hat this evening that's cute to look at but I need a test baby to see if it will really stay on. I used the pattern from here. It's a tie top baby hat and I've always liked that style. The other online pattern I found that I'm going to attempt to go along with the horsie blankie is this fleece stocking hat.

All three of us got our flu shots for free today. They didn't even hurt.

Son and I are going to the eye doctor next Wednesday. He says his sight goes blurry in one eye sometimes so we need to see what that's about. As for me, I need a glaucoma check. My dad has it, his mom had it, and all five of his siblings have it so I need to be careful. Glaucoma kind of sneaks up on people because of the way it quietly takes your peripheral vision, but you don't notice it till it's too late. If you pray, please pray that I may have no signs of it. I also made an appointment for a rash that our son has on his hands. He has my super sensitive skin, plus the air is so dry, plus he plays with the dogs even though he's allergic. I know that's what the rash is. I hope a doctor can prescribe something to control it.

Husband read in the news that Mormons are healthy because they fast, so we're going to fast on Saturday. I'm doing the spiritual part, but he's not. We've never fasted before. I told him he better have lots of drinks in the fridge cause I'm gonna need alotta drinks. Ha! I asked him to buy some Gatorade too because it contains electrolytes. I need electrolytes.

It's the 12th. Where has the year gone?

I stopped cussin'

Once you delve into The Word, you'll never be the same.

I've ended a lifelong habit of using foul language. I'll have to check my blog to see when I decided to stop cussin' and cursin' but I know it's been over a year. At first I just wanted to challenge myself to exercise mindfulness on a daily basis. But after the first day I realized it was gonna be a leetle bit harder than I thought it would be.

Try not to use any foul language for 24 hours. Next, extend it to 48 hours, then go for seven days in a row. It'll fry your brain.

I set this goal for myself on a whim, but it changed me. I know it sounds like such a minor undertaking but it turned out to be so much more. I used to spew forth four letter words right and left right in front of my eldest son when he was a tot. I didn't give it a second thought and little did I realize how awful it sounded. But I sounded like everyone else I knew. My mother and father both use foul language. Everyone I knew used foul language. I never gave it a thought. It is an outer expression of an inward state of mind.

I didn't see anything wrong with pornography either. I told my oldest son when he was 15 that I didn't want it in the house, but such a hypocrite I was. Question is, why did I figure it was okay for me but not for him? Seventy-five percent of Americans call themselves Christians and yet pornography is a 6.3 billion dollar industry. I considered myself a Christian when I got a survey from our internet service provider that asked what type of subjects we wanted more access to and I clicked several options, including pornography. Well! I was being an honest Christian consumer!

Doesn't look like I'll be running for office any time soon. They'd wipe up the floors with the Liliana. But a worldly Christian looks just like the world.

Now when I hear profanity it's ten times uglier than it used to be. When the human ear is constantly exposed to vulgar language the mind grows desensitized. The nose becomes accustom to the stink. Habitual cussers no longer smell the putrid stench and it flows out of them unabated.

At first I'd get by a couple days. Every time I let loose, I'd say "Okay, I'm starting over...starting...NOW!" I had lots of new starts and lots of prayer time. I admit, I still think bad words sometimes. Sometimes a good cursing just seems like the best thing to make a problem, an irritation, a hurt, smaller. I suppose it releases some energy, but is it what I want to release into my world. Words matter. Words are powerful. People, as Fox once said, remember words.

We have a neighbor who says that she and her husband are cussing a lot less because our son reminds them that they shouldn't. She was smiling when she told me about it and then she said our son is a good kid. I think she felt good about cussin' less. They were successful truck drivers before retirement. Sometimes my husband tries to cut back on his cussing. He's an ex-sailor.

For Bible study today I did a drama with my son. I acted like a truck driver spewing forth the Lord's name in vain (he got a hearty laugh from my acting) and I asked him, "What should you do when you hear someone use our Lord's name in vain?" We are so weary of hearing Christian and non-Christian alike say "Oh my God." It is the most worn out, overused, tired phrase, eveh. We discussed it and I told him this. Say, "Hey, I know God's son, Jesus! He lived. He died. He said in three days He would Rise. And He did." I'm going to do this too. We're sick of hearing the Lord's name used in vain. People need to get a life.

Anyway, I challenge you today to stop cussin'. Go for it. It's the road less traveled. It's a worthy endeavor.

Now if I can just be more thoughtful of others every day. That ought to revolutionize my life.

That's a big whoops

Last night I was feeling for the light switch but I hit the switch to pull in the slideouts. My husband came flying out of the bedroom. He'd gone to bed early and when he heard the room folding in he jumped up from a dead sleep quicker than lightning. The thing is, I only tapped the switch, but the automatic slideout wouldn't stop rolling in. It was pretty exciting all right. I was calling my son and was almost crying because I thought I messed up the trailie. I thought there were jacks under the slideout, but there aren't. It was okay. Now there's duct tape over the switch so no one inadvertently does that again. Yeah right, duct tape looks real nice on the wall. Great stuff, duct tape is.

My dispute with eBay is closed. My money order officially lost. My bad luck.

I might possibly dance in El Paso next week. We'll see. I don't have all the info yet. I told my teacher I'm interested if it's a family venue. My husband said it's okay if I go.

It might snow a bit tonight but there are no clouds right now. Snow would be neato!

I want to write about cussing and cursing. Should I do it here or make a separate post?

Kettletop Mountain today

Received my scimitar this afternoon. It balances! I'm thrilled to have it in my hands. It balances very well which I'm glad about because some people said not to buy one sight unseen, but what choice have I? It's not like I'm going to run into a balancing scimitar somewhere in the New Mexican desert. I'm going to use it for a few days then submit a good review to the web site where I bought it. It's so shiny! I will need a little padding for my noggin though. I'm not sure I can get used to it with no padding. I've read that some women got some broken hairs from where the scimitar sits on their head and I surely can't afford that. I walked around with it on my head for about ten minutes. My husband doesn't want me to use in in the trailer. I hope I can change his mind about that because sometimes it's cold outside. I want to get a piece of cork for the tip because, dang, it's sharp. Saroyan swords can take a long walk off a short pier as far as I'm concerned. I have a sword that balances, cost a lot less money, looks like a bad mojambo, and if I didn't like it I could have returned it. Saroyan doesn't take returns. Saroyan will never get my money either.

My hair is so dirty. I wanted to wash it Sunday morning but our hot water heater wasn't working very well. After my last chilly shower I was not too keen on taking a chance with another one. I wash my bangs and pull my hair back and it's passable. I figured I'm probably the only one looking at myself that much at church anyway.

We went to Cruces today. I'm kind of getting to know one of the employees at Jo-Ann Fabrics. She's Chinese (I think) and I like her. I think she has a son in Europe. We chatted about weather and she asked me what I'm making and said I'm clever, which I'm not but she's awful nice to say so. I feel her personality and I like it. She's always helpful and nice even with people who ask inane questions like how much of this do I need. I think she gets that a lot!

My money order for my purple skirt and veil seems to be lost. I submitted a tracer request at the post office today and WE3Bellydance cancelled my order. I guess eBay has a time limit for orders. It's the skirt I really wanted after intense online shopping, so don't know what I'll do now.

The photo is my favorite landmark here - Kettletop Mountain. Ted Turner owns all that land over there. Guess he's buying up Nebraska too and peeps are upset about it. He's buying everything over the Ogallala aquifier which is the largest aquifer in the world. And it just happens to be smack dab under Nebraska. My family on my dad's side are there and that's how come I know how to fry chicken so well.

The day was rainy. All day. But there was a rainbow at the end of the loop here tonight and across the lake Kettletop was partially bathed in sunshine. The clouds above it are an unusual sight. This is the view from the front of our trailer. I wish we had a window pointing that direction, but we have to go outside to see it. I'm not complaining!

Chocolate mice treat

The day is done. The luminarias were not lit, the crowds were smaller due to the wind, but those hardcore people who out came had a good time. My chocolate mice were a big hit!

The ladies at The Friends site went on and on about how cute they were. They asked me how I made them and said they wanted to make them too. One lady said she had to take two to her daughters and that one of her daughters made these sort of things and she just had to show her one. I felt a little shy that they carried on so, but I was complimented too. I felt good. I never make things like this! After about 1/2 an hour of announcing to passersby that we had free posole soup I said I have to check my mice to see if anyone ate them, but I couldn't find the plate. One of the volunteers said, "Oh. We hid them. We're keeping them for us to eat." lol! So all the volunteers ate them. As I watched the fireworks I saw two men walk up to the table and the one said to the other, "Hey, do you like chocolate? You have to try one of these." I was bustin' with pride by then. Even men liked them?

They were a little stuck to the foil, so I bought wax paper for next time (like, um, the directions say to do). I let them cool for two hours before I put on the eyes and nose. Here are four that I caught. Haha! I made 23. Not all of the marachino cherries were worthy of being a food craft project. If they were too split up I didn't use them.

Windy wind

We're not lighting anything. Too windy. Maybe at 5:00pm they said, but the wind is not dying down. It's picking up. There are sandstorms on the beach and tumble weeds a-blowin' by.

I made the mice! My husband said they're cute. I'll see if they get eaten and if people like them tonight. I haven't tried one because they look too sweet for me, but the kidlets oughta like them. He had to take me to the market because I bought a big tube of gel for the eyes and you need a teeny tube.

Lunchtime

We put out bags till about noon. I mostly straightened candle wicks and pushed candles into the sand in each bag so that the candle lighters just have to bend down and light the candles without fussing with the candle itself. Now we're home in our trailie eating Coney dogs from Sonic Burger. Yum!

All are concerned about the winds. It's very windy right now. It wasn't like this last year. I don't know if we're going to be able to light the candles! All the bags have been set out but the wind is blowing so much that the bags are bent over. I think when we light them they'll either blow right out or burn up the bags. Either way, is not good.

...I just check the weather report. We've got winds of 30mph and gusts up to 45mph. Oh dear. It's going to be so sad it there are no luminarias. The luminarias add all the ambiance to the beach walk and the boat show. And it's too big an event to call off now.

The lake is pea green and has white caps. Everyone is worried!

I took ibuprofen for my lower back. I need to make chocolate mice or take a nap. Which shall I do? Lighting is scheduled for 3:00pm. I'm scheduled to help The Friends volunteers at 5:30 at their Luminaria site. Aside from the bad weather, shin splints and an achy back, I feel happy! I think our ranger is stressed out though.

Luminaria preparations

Here we go to set out bags! I'm wearing my ski pants to keep my legs warm. The day is blustery. Possibility of showers.

I don't think precipitation is good for Luminarias?

There's good and bad

The good news is UPS says my scimitar will be delivered on Monday! The bad news is my money order for my faux silk skirt and matching veil has not arrived to its destination. It appears to be lost. The eBay lady opened a dispute on the 5th and I think she's being patient, but I am not sure if she might decide to give me a bad mark. I'm not sure if she's nice or not. She seems a little short. When I had a problem with the Akai silks lady she was super nice. When it comes down to the wire, I could care less about a bad mark on my puny eBay history but having my money order lost - that hurts my feelings a lot. I think she should have just emailed with me and not opened a dispute. I do not feel good about a dispute. She asked me to put a tracer on it and on Monday I'll go to the USPS to see how to do that. I've never heard of putting a tracer on a piece of mail. I don't have a lot of faith in the post office. Either she'll get my letter or she won't. I'm not ordering anything from eBay any more.

And I'm at my wits end with doing parables for our devotional with my husband. He says they're all hard to understand - even after I explain them. He says why don't they just come out and say what they mean. I explained that parables were common in those times. I explained that the fact that they are parables is the reason why they survived through oral tradition long enough to be written down. I explained that Jesus wants to make you think and wants to make you ask questions. My pearls of wisdom fall on deaf ears.

I don't know. Maybe I should change my devotionals. He's smarter than I am. I think he's being stubborn and mule-headed. He's trying to make me mad.

First 40" pic

Tonight I came to log on and when I saw my post title I thought it looked like I wrote "dam" glasses and I thought How did I write that! But upon closer inspection I see the r and n in darn are just very close together.

This is my first hair pic since I hit the 40" point. This is 40.5". The bottom of my bottom still evades me. Maybe, hmmm, I'll hit that benchmark in two more months which should, if lucky, be one more inch which according to my scientific calculations will then equal 41.5".

Son is doing school right now. He wants tomorrow off so he can help the rangers with Luminaria preparations. He especially wants to go with them to pick up the hay for the hayride. I like evenings like this when he wants to do his studies and I can just let him go and he tells me what he wants to do - and he does pretty well I'll say. I'm developing him to be autodidactic individual. Nights like this give a sense that I'm doing something right.

I'm supposed to be at ballet, but I have shin splints and feminine aches and a bad mood on top of it all. My bad mood just flew right in at about 5:30pm. It is nice that my class is not a school class where I miss out on learning a combination and am graded. If don't feel like going it's no big. That's nice.

Here's a second one from today. Me fussing and swishing my hair outside. I had on a pretty hair bobble to do a picture of the plain, back-of-nape, pony tail. But alas, my hair is so slick that my bobble slipped right off my pony onto the ground. And this is day one post wash. That's lame.

These darn glasses

Reading glasses are a pain. I can't read without them anymore. I look all over the trailer for them. I search high and low and angrily accuse others of moving them. I throw the pillows and check the sofa creases and pull open every drawer in the kitchen. I sit down in my chair at my wits end. Can't read a thing without them. I put my head in my hands in utter despair. And then I realize I feel something. My reading glasses. There they are. Right where I put them.

They're were sitting on the top o' my punkin head the whole time.

Filling bags for the Luminaria

Saturday night is the Christmas Luminaria! Today our family helped fill 4,000, yes, four thousand, brown lunch bags with sand. Some people filled bags, some pulled up the wicks on the candles, some set candles in the bags, some carried bags from the picnic tables to the staging area, some arranged the bags in neat rows. Best of all, this year kids from the local Christian school came out and helped! The had such bright, shiny faces. Last year the job took us volunteers three hours. This year it took only two hours and we did a thousand more additional bags this year than last. Woohoo! We all clapped and hollered for the kids to thank them when they left.

It's my favorite activity here at the park. Saturday morning we shall help set all 4,000 bags out along the luminaria path. Saturday about 3:00pm we begin lighting the candles. My husband got me a bitchen propane torch for lighting the candles. It's a lot of bending down and if you have only a clicker for lighting them, it's killer. We found that out the first year. Now, it's torches for us!

40.5" today

Hair talk - Forty point five inches.

Second baby blanket finito! This is for a four year old nephew who likes horses and is crazy about the cowboy boots his mom bought him. It feels so soft. My stitches weren't as even as I'd like because my sewing foot didn't walk evenly all the time. Still, for a little boy it's okay. He'll never notice some of the stitching is uneven. The thickness made the sewing a little more challenging. I hope when he sees it that it makes his eyes happy. I'm going to make some kind of a gift card to go with the blankets that will explain that they're meant to be used - in the car, at home, dragged on the floors, and taken out of doors. Hmmm, got a little rhyme going there. I might use that. And they're sturdy, 100% polyester, 100% washable. I'm making the pink one next. Hot pink satin and kitty cats!

Got an email that my sword should be in the UPS mail tomorrow. Hoo boy! I was kind of worried about that back order deal, but looks like it'll be a-okay. I hope it balances well.

Hanukkah starts today my husband said. Advent began last Sunday. I do love the Advent season, a time to prepare our hearts for Christmas - the celebration of the birth of Christ, the Messiah. I made our Advent wreath today. It's a little bit pretty. I like it. We're doing a devotional each night after dinner. My husband is sure warming up to Jesus. I feel he is. Everyone goes at their own speed and you can support and encourage, but no one should be forced or rushed. The waiting is killing me though. I impress myself because I can see that I've learned so much in the past few years. I can actually answer questions regarding the reading. It's important to learn and grow. Many Christians claim the Christianity, but they're like infants suckling still. It takes effort and persistence to grow in faith. After our scripture reading which was Matthew 21:12-22 tonight, we sang the Christmas carol "Do You Hear What I Hear?" We have awful voices, but we have fun singing. We sound so bad that we just laugh and laugh at ourselves!

Fleece

I found a horse pattern fleece. It's anti-pill and so soft. Tonight I pinned the binding on it and tomorrow I'll sew it. I bought cream colored fleece for the other side. It feels rather plush with the two together.

It was a pretty day. Sunny and cool. I still didn't get around to washing my hair though. I absolutely have to get it done tomorrow. We got home from Cruces about 3:00pm, so I had to put away groceries and I just don't know where the rest of the day went.

We stopped for Mexican for lunch and it was the best. Last week we got Mexican food that was barely edible. It was awful. One thing I can't stand are those taco shells preformed that you buy at the store. Awful. There should be a law. I'm appalled to be served those fake taco shells at a restaurant with hamburger inside. The place we found today was just a little hole in the wall place. When we walked in the girl behind the counter greeted us (that's unusual) and after we placed our order she asked if we wanted a bowl of "Welcome Soup." Man, that soup was some kind of good. It was a very small cup full, but what a nice idea. Welcome Soup. Very cool. I told my husband as we ate our lunches at the rest stop that the food we bought was as good as what we used to eat in El Centro when I was ten years old, minus the cucurachas!

Our favorite restaurant in El Centro in 1968 was El Sombrero...until one time during dinner my mom saw a huge, well fed cockroach in the kitchen area. I didn't see it. She never took us back to El Sombrero again. What I remember best are the buñuelos my sister and I ate for dessert. I never see them on the menus anywhere anymore. I think back on those buñuelos wistfully.

Cooper's Hawk

The week-end is over. But tomorrow we're going to Cruces so it's not a normal workaday day for us. I hope to buy some cowboy boot patterned fleece to make a blanket for my nephew. That's the last of the blanket notions and fabric I'll need for the year. And we have to get candles and styrofoam to make our Advent wreath on the cheap.

I didn't get anything done today except for a giant nap after church. I did a big, loud WAAAHOOO in church in support of my pastor's wife this morning. She did today's sermon in her husband's place because he's in the Philippines for the week. He spoke at a pastor's conference and helped feed kids who live at the dump and is visiting orphanages. The U.S.A. stinks in a lot of ways. It's far from perfect and wrought with social and financial problems, but there are no children living at the dumps eating garbage to survive a day at a time. We were hoping to go to Mexico this year, but stories about brutal attacks on tourists has quickly changed our mind. I wouldn't even go down with a group of campers now. Bummer. I think we'll go to Grand Canyon, the Tetons, and Wyoming this year. We think fuel's going to be high so we won't be venturing across the continent that's for sure. Can't afford long travel days at $4.00 per gallon fuel.

Got a pic of that raptor that likes to prey on my po' wittle quail. He's young. Very beautiful bird. I caught sight of him while I was sitting at the kitchen table. Went outside and walked a wide circle round him trying not to annoy him. I've never seen him on that pole before.

Wanted to get a hair pic, but it hasn't been washed for a few days and I kinda want to measure after it's washed and dried. I'm over 40" finally, I know that. Woo hoo! I'm still not classic length though. My bum is so low. Maybe if I squeeze my cheeks they'll go a little higher and I can say I'm classic. I'll try that.

Tomorrow is Friday

Today was another good day. I forgot to say that yesterday we got our molding for the sides of the trailer installed. We found a super good, honest, trailer repair guy. I like him quite a bit. It wasn't cheap, but he did a good job. We're real happy with the fix. The tire blowout last summer thrashed the whole side of the trailer. It is fixed and pretty now. Praise the Lord we don't have to drive down the road looking like Ma and Pa Kettle.

My present from my husband came in the mail today. I have them on right now. He got me a darling pair of Minnetonka moccasins. They are totally cute! And WARM. I get icy cold feet and I complain about them. They're not cold now I tell ya! Not only are they warm, but I can wear them with skirts and I do love the look of a skirt with boots and thermal underwear underneath. Way cute in my opinion. I will try to take a pic of them tomorrow. Yeah, that's a good idea.

I didn't get any sewing done today. Tomorrow I will for sure though.

I had a tummy ailment which I will spare the details, but I didn't feel like going to ballet tonight. Thing is, I went, I was the only student who showed up, and it was great. At dance class I always forget my troubles. Since I was the only student we worked on pirouettes. This week I'm going to practice half turns because my fulls are sloppy. It felt so good to stretch at the barre. What was also nice is that she did the barre in front of me, like a mirror reflection?, so I could copy her stylization such as how to hold your head. I have the routine down fairly, but I have always lacked the ballerina attitude. Got no 'tude.

I have a link to share for a holiday sweet treat that's fun to eat. I think it looks very doable! Chocolate Cherry Mice at craftster.org

Generally, I feel well. I wish to bottle this feeling and have it every day. Not possible? I know. But still...

First baby blanket done

I did it! Is it pretty? I think it's pritty pretty. The corners turned out nicely too. Next I'm starting on a pink one for a baby girl. It's a wild pink. One side is fleece kitty cats and I chose a flannel backed satin for the other side and I will add white satin binding like this one.

I had a rather nice day. A good day. For one, when we went to the library I heard a guy across the street say lookitthathair as I got in the truck. Well, it was a old grizzled voice, but I don't care. A compliment is a compliment. Haha! There's a utility company across the street and that's the direction the voice came from. I was embarrassed to turn around. I have to be cool, ya know.

Our son got his free personal pan pizza from Pizza Hut for reaching his reading goal. What a great program - the Bookit Program. He was nonplussed that I got him signed up and set up to participate, but now he's all happy about it. Boys get ripped off in reading at school. I'm proud to say, I taught him to read. He loves Beverly Cleary. In his contract he agreed to read 20 minutes per day and he's read twice that amount. Life is good.

Also on the edumacational front, he has begun his first research paper. I've put it off for two months because he hates writing. He is my extremely reluctant writer. He can talk, he's engaged and engaging, but ask him to write it down? Forget it. So I postponed it till today. Had myself all prepped and pumped and, surprise, surprise, it went well. Exceedingly well. Looks like he's interested in LED lights as a topic. He said, "Mamma, I'm kind of excited about this." Woohoo! I didn't act excited though. I just said, "Well, good." I have to stay cool and psyche him out.

Oh happy day

We drove to Cruces for supplies. I got to spend the whole time at JoAnn's Fabrics. I got all the stuff to make a couple (hopefully cute) baby blankets. Tonight I sewed a mini sized practice blanket with, get this, with mitered corners and it turned out. Yay! Tomorrow I'll sew a real one - size 36"x45". The fabric is light blue fleece with floaty white clouds and I chose white satin binding for the edge. I have a good feeling about it! Third time's the charm they say.

Oh no

Christmas is coming. My second baby blanket turned out, meh, just all right, but it's not very giftable. Maybe I should just send the babies all twenty bucks each and be done.

If I find her

If ever I find the woman who posted the easy peasy baby blanket I will strangle her with my own two hands.

My easy peasy blanket took me two days to make. I finished it. It's now in the trash which is where it belongs.

I'm going to try a different pattern with no stinkin' satin binding. When you sew one side of the binding you having no idea what's happening on the other side. You might be be 1/2" above the bottom of the binding or you might be 1/4" below the edge of the binding missing the binding completely so it's just blowing in the wind unattached. And don't even talk to me about mitered corners.

Trying

I'm trying to sew a baby blanket. It's flannel and I bought pretty satin binding for the edge. The last mitered corner is a bearcat though. I hope I can make it work. I suppose I've spent three hours already on a one hour "easy peasy" sewing project that failed to even mention the last corner is harder to do than the first three.

I decided I will make my dad a rice warmer for his arm that hurts. His ankles hurt sometimes too I think. I had one that I made for myself and I loved how it warmed my frozen feet at night. I will make my dad two maybe. One for his back which he could use pretty much anywhere, and one about 5"x30" for his arm.

Mermayd. She's the one got me goin'. She's made some awesome jewelry gifts. She sent me pics and boy, one of 'em was real shiny and it's still shining in my mind! She's gotten so good at designing necklaces.

Happy Thanksgiving!

Husband is making the mashed potatoes. Son is bouncing off the walls in anticipation. I'm waiting for the water heater to warm up all ten gallons of water so I can wash my hair. I'd planned to go the camp showers today, but a cold north wind blew in during the night. It's 37 degrees outside! Yipes. Yesterday was in the 70s.

1 Thessalonians 5:18. Give thanks in all things.

Happy Thanksgiving!

Today I bake a cakes

Bake a cakes? What? I can't talk now?

I have pictures of the cake in question on my November 2006 page. You need to scroll about 1/4 down the page.

I dreamt of Debbie Turner last night. I dreamt I was real ugly with awful swollen lips from cold sores, but she didn't seem to notice I was ugly. I cried in the dream, but can't remember why. Twenty years passed and I dream of her? Will I still miss her when I'm 80 years old? I need memory erasure.

Time to start mixing the cake frosting now.

Ow

My right arm has been achy all day today.

I impressed my husband with my after dinner talk tonight. I'm very pleased with myself. I told him all about Martin Luther and his 95 Theses and I told him how Constantine created Christendom when he made Christianity the official religion. Usually he has no attention span when I talk to him about churchy stuff, but he liked this subject. He ate it up with a spoon. I do too.

My connection is deadly slow tonight for some reason. It's bumming me out.

What am I

There is a study I've wanted to undertake. It's been bouncing around in my mind. Simmering.

The other day my son said he knew we were Christians, but he needed to know what kind of Christian because the neighbors asked and he wasn't sure. Also, I had a conversation with a Hindu and I did not say I was Christian when she gave me some excellent witchcraft tips.

I would have had to blurt it out. I can blurt pretty well, but I tend to prefer that my actions show my faith rather than plainly stating it.

... I'm Christian" or "I'm a Christian." What does that make you think? Well, I tell ya, I've met a lot of them and wasn't impressed by a single one for 20 years. And what about the people who believe in God, but not in Christ. They also call themselves Christian. "Christ" is a pretty key part of the word Christian.

So what am I. What can I say that states my position with more clarity than "Christian?" Christian should be the best word, but it annoys me slightly.

I'm thinking I'll tell my son to say we're disciples of Jesus Christ, Son of God. And that's what I can say to the Hindu person if it comes up again. I'm not sure, I'm just thinking in writing. I want our response to not be with a period at the end. I don't want it to be a dead end. I want our response to elicit interest, curiosity, and possible discussion - even just one question. Once I met a woman who stated she was a Christian then she went on a long rambling monologue about her history of alcoholism and being saved. It was neither inviting nor warm. As I think back, the best way to express it is that it was like a giant regurgitation and she felt better afterwards. I think maybe she intended it to be a testimony, but if so, it did not have the desired effect.

I need to address the denomination question for my son too. We are non-denominational and we attend various churches depending on where we are. Always Protestant. But people want to know what denomination you are, he is, for classification purposes. I like the Charismatics (this is like a lighter flavor of Pentecostals), but I am not convicted regarding all of its beliefs. I like Calvary Chapel's verse by verse teaching, but some regions of the country have no Calvary Chapels (known for its Jesus Freaks back in the day). The Baptists are pretty cool and uniform wherever I go. I love the physical beauty of the Catholic church, but not its paternalism. I have never been in a synagogue, but I'd like to someday. The Seventh Day Adventists sure eat healthy, but I can't do church on Saturday. There are a bunch of churches that I don't even know what their doctrinal distinctives are. Distinctives are what sets your church apart from others. Maybe we're multi-denominational. You can liken it to the old question of what is zero. Is it nothing? If it's nothing, then it must be something, so what is it? Is zero something? Then how can zero equal nothing if it's something. How do we quantify zero.

So is anyone really non-denominational. What denomination was Jesus?

I have known for sometime that something big happened to Christianity somewhere around 300 A.D. Last night I discovered that it had to with the Roman emperor Constantine. He was the first Roman emperor to claim his Christianity. The capital of Rome was even moved and renamed Constantinople after him. It is present day Istanbul.

It was he who instituted the change that created "Christendom." This christendom thing is huge. It changed everything. I think it changed everything to opposite of what Jesus preached and taught.

I have to go to bed now. Tomorrow's a school day. I'm researching more about Christendom and will post it tomorrow. Stuff I need to define for our (planned) lesson:

Christendom
Catholic (which means universal)
Martin Luther
Protestantism
Hey, hey, we can even throw in antidisestablishmentarianism, which he can already spell. :)
Mega churches and seeker-friendly

This is one of the things I absolutely love about homeschooling. We don't have to stick to a standardized curriculum. I need to teach him basically about how the church divided and developed into what it is today.

Really, the people are the church, not buildings.

I'm not so bad

I got happy at belly dance tonight. As you may recall, I felt rather ill about that dern sword falling off my head 80 times last Saturday night. And after that it affected my dancing altogether. Afterwards, at home by myself it was eating little small bites of confidence out of me.

But at class tonight three girls came up to me (grown women, but I say girls for my blog) and gave me compliments on my dancing of Saturday night! One said she couldn't decide whether to watch me or my teacher and so her eyes went back and forth. She said she and her friends talked about it for two days. She said that the costumes made our dance moves even prettier to watch. The best compliment though came from a girl from India. A real Indian girl who is a dancer. She dances folk dances of India and I hear she's very good though I haven't seen her choreography yet. But the thing is, she said my movements were so very feminine and flowing that she was thinking she would like me to dance with her in her Indian style. Boy howdy, I told her I would love to learn her style if she wanted to teach me! She said she's not a good teacher and cannot break down the moves like our Middle Eastern dance teacher does, and I said, "Well, how do you know if you haven't tried teaching it before?" I should have told her I can pick up moves pretty well too. I hope something may come of it. She's young and nice, dainty and petite. She recently finished university here and is now on a work visa. Her husband is still in India until next year and she misses him terribly. He's in the military there. She liked the skirt I was wearing tonight and said it reminds her of her saris at home. She says during the wedding season everyone loves to dress up in India. It reminded me sooo much of Leia because she once wrote about the exact same thing to me in an email! They call it "The Wedding Season." Interesting! We don't dress up much here she said, and I have to agree.

And I thought my teacher almost might cry when she was apologizing about the sword. Evidently the sword was her friend's and she thought it was better than hers is. But even though my teacher's sword is nothing expensive or amazing, I knew how to feel it on my head. Never do a performance with a sword you've never used before. Yeah, I'm an Einstein now! Plus, my teacher expressed to another student that I've been dancing for years and I interrupted and told her, no, I have but eight months of Middle Eastern dance. She was surprised and said she couldn't believe it. Well, I suppose it's actually a left handed compliment to me. So when I left class she asked me if I forgive her and I said of course. I have no hard feelings toward her, only toward myself. Ha! I did tell her no improv for me for awhile. She looked disappointed, but my confidence is a little tattered and I need some time. It all builds character, right? Yes, it does actually.

Anyway, it served to erase, eradicate, delete, deter my bad feelings. I mean, don't you hate those sick, sinking feelings? It's awful. Well, it's really gone now and I'm not just saying that for lip service. Also I learned a good lesson - that as bad as I feel, if I keep moving I am probably not as bad as I think. I thought I stunk completely, but if I break it down I think I did okay when I didn't have that evil sword on my head.

I've been writing about this a lot, I know, but it was a small drama for me. The inward drama being ten times worse than the real thing, huh.

Next performance I'm going to ask my girlfriends to pray for me that I don't flub up. That will give me a special, heavenly boost.

Tomorrow is a brand new day. Isn't that something! Yeah man. A brand new day.

Happy

I was sharp in ballet tonight - for a change! I felt great afterwards. We don't meet next week because of Thanksgiving. Bummer. It was chilly tonight, so finally I got to wear my black knit leggings. I wore my hair in a side braid.

They liked the homemade chicken noodle soup a lot. Their 13 year old said it was addictive. That's a big compliment coming from a picky 13 year old. The husband liked it. And my friend told our son it made her feel better.

Now there's a request for chicken noodle soup on Saturday night from my husband and son. I really had to fend them off yesterday. They were smelling that soup all afternoon and wanted to eat it. I almost had to fight them. I wielded the ladle like a weapon, like a sword, and said "No, no, this isn't for us. It's for someone else!" I got it delivered to the neighbors in the nick of time.

It doesn't get better than this. :)

And I'm wearing my new Eddie Bauer, plaid, pink and cranberry colored, flannel pajamas. My husband picks the cutest stuff. I'm all warm and cuddlebug. I'd have never picked this style. It reminds me of Lucy from I Love Lucy. She had pajamas just like these.

Think I'll have some Nabisco Nilla cookie wafers with milk and hit the hay. Tomorrow is Friday!

I did something good

I did a certain Christian thing that I've never done before. A lady at church had surgery today. She asked me to pray for her and I am. And I made some chicken noodle soup and took it to her family. I'm not too good in the kitchen. My husband does most of the cooking, but I am the queen of chicken soup. I prayed over it as I prepared it. I hope they like it. My husband bought freshly baked sourdough bread to go with it and boy howdy, it's delicious with the bread. He's always thinking! It been proven that chicken soup aids healing. That's science! And who created science. God created science. Chicken soup made with love has purpose.

A long time ago I made a pie and the hostess of the party said my pie must have given everyone a stomach ache. Ever since then I've been totally paranoid about giving homemade food to people. I wrote about the mean lady here, so I won't rehash the event. Anywho, I'm feeling very smug that I courageously cooked chicken noodle soup and delivered it today. It would be so me to cook it and then say, "No, it didn't turn out well enough. We can't deliver it. We have to keep it." But I didn't do that. I followed through. I so much hope they like eating it.

This afternoon I saw the hawk that preys on our quail. It's a Cooper's Hawk I think! I read that they're also called Chicken Hawks. He's a beauty. No quail came around after he swooped by. He flies faster than lightening.

Finally ordered a skirt and veil to go with my cabaret costume. I bought dark purple because my costume, it's called a bedlah which refers to the costume bra and belt that goes around your hips, is purple. I stressed out over lilac or purple and thinking that lilac would draw more attention on stage being light colored, I almost got it. But the purple was the color that really called out to me. I asked our son which I should get because he has a good eye for color and he hardly thought a moment and said, "Purple." It takes six whole weeks for them to deliver it because they custom order it. The fabric, I chose it because it has a remarkable sheen to it. It's called faux silk. I have to think up some sleeves to cover my upper arms. They're not as firm as they once were. I want to attach perhaps purple chiffon bell sleeves to the bra strap. I need a little bit of fabric over the bust too as I want to be appropriately dressed to dance at a family oriented venue. We don't want to see the girls spilling out all over the place now do we. Certainly not! I think it's going to be duperly pretty!

Tomorrow I'm going to definitely worsh my hair and give it some attention. I got two nice comments tonight; one from Kara and one all the way from down under - that would be Jules. I am so fond of the women I've met on the hair board. Kara and Jules have both been there for me when I was unsettled by church and religion issues, or looking for an answer, or worried.

It's important to have reliable people you can reach out to when you have no one to talk to.

Bike riding

I rode my bike a whopping three miles yesterday and again today. My favorite part is the downhill part and going over the speedbumps! I did some belly dance drills afterwards. Then I had to make steamed rice to go with the salmon my husband barbecued. I have a song I might use to choreograph a sword dance. Practice sword dancing, that is. My teacher suggested the song and I think it'll work great. Speaking of my teacher...

I may have forgotten to mention that I danced downtown with my teacher and another tribe on Saturday night. As a result, I've learned that improv is not for me. No, no, no, no more improv for me to songs I don't know. When I danced in Southern California it was choreographed. I can memorize a dance. I am not so good at making up my moves as I go along. So. My teacher told me to dance with a sword on my head too, only I don't have a sword. I've practiced with hers for a couple classes and that's the sum of it. I enjoy using her sword and I balanced it pretty well if doing simple moves. Once I even got down to my knees and up again without dropping it. I was so thrilled. I practice at home with books on my head.

Well, I should have practiced my freedom of speech, but I'm lame and quiet. I gave her a look of petrified fear and she said, "You can do it." And she gave me not her sword, but a different sword that I've never even seen before. That should have set off the alarms, right? It did for me, but not her. But I still didn't say no.

Sigh. I went out with her and did it and that thing slid off my head about 80 times. It was a six minute song. Geez. It seemed to last forever. On the up side, it's a teeny town, I saw no one I knew, and the small crowd was really nice. I never dropped it, it just wouldn't stay. Then after the dance she told me she put wax on her sword to help it stay on her head. What!? I am never doing improv with her again. My ego was bruised, you can be sure of that, but I'm better now. It's funny because I never felt like crying, I was just upset. Truthfully, what upset me most was dancing poorly in front of the other dancers. It's just a darn good thing that I already performed a couple times because if that had been my first time I'd have been thoroughly discouraged from performing.

I did see one friend, Judy. She missed my dancing, but saw me afterwards and we chatted. She liked my costume and I told her I danced badly, so I'm glad she didn't see me. She wouldn't believe me and said she was going to tell everyone I was awesome. She lifted my spirits. Sure enough, she saw my husband at the market a couple days later and told him I was great. She was my angel that night.

Yum

Last night our son made me hor'dourves when I got home. They were delicious! He made eight. All lined up neatly on the cutting board, Ritz crackers with jack cheese and a small piece of ham. I love seeing him working in the kitchen. He was so solicitous. "Mamma," he said, "Here they are and if you want some more just let me know and I'll make them."

My looking glass

Like Romper Room. I look through my looking glass and who do I see? My mom! Aaaaahhhh!

Hi (((Mom))). I'm not colicky anymore, but I'm still a pain to have around, eh? Heh. Sorry about that!

Already

Tomorrow is Friday already? I can't believe it. We have a volunteer meeting at 10:00am tomorrow. Why is the meeting so early?

Scimitar ordered

I did it. I finally chose a sword. Technically, I ordered a scimitar not a sword. A top of the line sword is about $200.00. Since I'm a beginner I shopped for a cheaper one. I considered a Saroyan which is very high quality, but I couldn't believe they have a no return policy on their swords. I emailed and inquired about their return policy and got a snooty reply. Marge told me if I want a trial period to buy a sword from somewhere else. I don't want a stinkin' trial period. If I don't like it I want to be able to get my money back. She said they've never had a dissatisfied customer in 35 years and have more business than they can handle. Yeah, I'll take my money somewhere all right. She can count on it. I went down to their shop when I lived nearby and bought my zills. Nice zills, nice guy, but whomever answers their email could use a lesson in customer service. We make all kinds of online purchases from desktop computer to beads. I would never order anything that has a no return policy!

So back to my scimitar. It's a scary looking one so I can't wait to take a picture of me with it to show my mother. Haha! It's unsharpened, but you still have to be cautious. Drop the tip of it on your toe and you'll have one less toe to worry about. The only unfortunate part is it's on backorder. Huge bummer, but it should come in this month they say. Their customer service was prompt. Ideally, I wanted one with the fancy scrolled engraving, but plain will do. It's a very sexy scimitar!

What kind of dove again?

My mom wrote me an email. She makes me laugh. And at the end she called me her little turdle dove. I am not quite sure how I should interpret that. Haha! She must be in an awfully good mood today.

I wrote my daughter-in-law. Finally. I've owed her an email for well-nigh a month. My eldest quit writing in the summer. I don't know why except he wants me to call and I don't like to call and I want him to email and he doesn't like to email. We are betwixt and between. Where is all this Middle English coming from tonight. I miss him sometimes. When he falls on my mind I accidentally call my youngest son by my oldest son's name. That's how I always know for sure he's on my mind. I miss him.

Time change

I was up at the crack of 8:30am because of the time change! Yay! We started our homeschool day early.

Oh

Sunday was terrible. I don't care to watch football. I sit statue-still and writhe. Try to blend, smile on cue. An emotional amalgamation of myself. Took a Tylenol PM because I don't want to start a stay awake trend. Rumination is a waste of precious time.

So Monday I was blue all day. Couldn't shake it. Gives me those bad feelings inside and I want it to go away. Sad to feel my old self in my new town. Too bad, so sad. I hate to disappoint my husband. We all went to Cruces and I ate a really bad burrito. Husband ordered me pajamas that are way, way too expensive. I could buy a whole belly dance costume for that much. I shall have warm cotton flannel pajamas instead. Oh.

And when we got home I browsed online for costumes. Then I felt much improved! Well, it was after the pajama ordering too. :)

I'm learning a Middle Eastern folkloric dance. It's cute and happy and upbeat, but I don't have the right costume yet. I'm not quite sure what kind I need. My only complete costume is American Tribal Style and that won't be right for the dance at all.

Son made fresh squeezed lemonade this evening and it was delicious. It puckered us up. Me especially. It's very good for your body. Lemonade from real lemons.

The other day he was riding his bike home after his volunteer work and a coyote crossed the road just yards in front of him. As he rode by he turned and looked behind. There went the coyote back to the other side of the road...with a squirrel in his mouth!

Tonight we sleep beneath a brand new comforter that is in a nice, new, bright white duvet. I like white to sleep in. And I will make myself have nice dreams. He maketh me to lie down in green pastures...

Saturday

I got my toenails done in my favorite shade of red. I soaked my feets and it felt so good. My son put his feet in too. All the rest of the day was incidental. Son went to a birthday party but I may have offended the hostess by not staying. Hmmmm.

November measure-in 39 7/8"

I had fun at the measure-in today. Several people like Kara, Lacemitts, and Avrilon have new pics up so I put one up too. I need a good new sig pic though. I haven't done one that I especially like since January 2006. That's kind a long space of time there.

This photo (below) shows my trouble spot. Three years ago I thinned out my bangs so they wouldn't be so heavy looking. Glad I did, but they're not as long as the rest of my hair now. As chance would have it this pic shows them pretty clearly at about waist length so you can see what I'm saying. It bugs me sometimes. It's more apparent on this side than the other. It's a bother because there's nothing I can do but wait for it to catch up.



The next one is swinging hair. Got a wee bit of motion in it. I thought 40" would be the bottom of my derrière, but the bottom of the derrière is technically a couple more inches lower. I'm not classic till I get there. I'm almost classic. My big plan is that once I get there, maybe about April, I'm going to trim for a couple years and stay there. I think. Actually, I'm getting a trim in March because that's when we're leaving and going to San Diego and I have to see my trusty barber, Ivan. I won't let anyone else trim my ends. I crave a trim right now, but I will wait. My ends are not bad. I oil them regularly, but I sure do like fresh cut ends. They're soooo purrrfect.

Improv, and I am breathless

I had tribal class tonight from 6:00 to 7:00pm. I wore my Melodia pants for the first time. These are the coolest belly dance pants with enormous bell bottoms and mine has a triangular sewn-on sash. Over them I added my tribal scarf with two rows of awesome fringe. Wore my hair down in a half-up. Got to class (it's in downtown) and there were so many trick-or-treaters going by that my teacher chirped, "Let's do improv and solos outside on the corner tonight!" Whuh? I was the only student who showed up for class. I've danced in front of an audience a handful of times over the years, always as a student, and never improv. Yiiiipes!

But courageous was I. I said, "Uhhhhhhhhhh, okay." And she and I danced together. ...To songs I have never heard.

...I was not that bad. She's very talented, but I didn't shame myself at least. I didn't do anything amazing or memorable, but I think I held my own passably. I was so, so nervous and it caused me to sweat so much that I built up a powerful case of underarm stink by the end of the evening. Fear does that! I don't usually sweat very much and when I got the shocking sniff that was me, I was so self-conscious I kept my arms down for the rest of class. Yeah, belly dancing with arms down. Haha! Fortunately the offensive odor didn't come on till about 8:00pm, so it was just our class, the second class, inside the studio by then. I sure hope no one noticed.

A friend came by and watched us dance for a bit and later after practice he and his wife dropped our son off and he told me I danced nice. I said, "You saw me? When?" And he said they were right in front of me and took a bunch of pictures. He said, "Didn't you see us?" He was really surprised I didn't, and I was too, but I tell you I did not see them! Evidently I was so nervous that I looked right at them and never saw them. Isn't that crazy? Nerves. They're funny, aren't they. Actually, it's probably a good thing I couldn't see them because who knows what could have transpired then. I might have tripped or something really lame.

I didn't take my dance sandals with me, so I danced barefoot on the sidewalk. Stubbed my next to the pinkie toe. It was bleeding a teensy bit. I told my teacher I should not do any more spins or turns.

When I got home I thanked the Lord for a body that operates efficiently (fairly so, we'll say), that takes me where I want, that healed well after I tried to destroy it, and even looks nice to boot. I saw people smile as we danced, women and children and men, and I smiled back. The crowd waxed and waned. The littlest kids were darling in their costumes and we ran out of candy in just one hour. A few guys in pick-up trucks may have hurt their necks as they drove by. The hour flew by. It makes me want to try harder.

I sat here so long thinking of what to type next that I noticed my keyboard actually says Q W E R T Y on the top left. Gosh, I'm so deep. I thought qwerty was merely a crazy word invented to describe the crazy arrangement of the letters on a keyboard. I didn't realize my keyboard actually spells out qwerty. Such a good word for Scrabble, isn't it. 'Luxury' is my favorite word for hangman.

Boy howdy, our son went out with family friends and scored such a load of candy that it'll last him clean through February. He was ebullient. He dressed up as the character of Jughead from Archie comics.

I got to look up at the New Mexico sky as I danced. I did snake arms down low then to my sides and worked them all the way up as high as I could. With my breath I did control and release, (yes, my brain was working partially, albeit on cruise control) and I swayed my arms to and fro with a small measure of grace. Well, with all the grace I could muster...like the leaves at the very top of a tree. If you are close up to me you can see my hands tremble slightly and steadily. With my hips I did a slow Maya, side to side. Smooth, relaxing, and hypnotic, I hope. It's one of my best moves. Both times I've belly danced in public I've been able to look up and see the sky. The first time was a night sky with hundreds of bright stars, and tonight was sunset with a line of pink orange on the horizon. It was good.

I am breathless.

I want to do it again.

A Psalm I like

Psalm 149:3
Let them praise his name in the dance: let them sing praises unto him with the timbrel and harp.

I found this tonight. Yeah, like I'm the first one to find it.

And I think to begin and finish with 'Selah' is ideal. 'Selah' in Hebrew means to meditate, or be silent and pray. Only in silence can I hear His still small voice. I like to shout sometimes too. It's a powerful outward affirmation. Sometime tomorrow I'm going to do a shout. :)

Hmmm

I had a bun photo that was getting too many visitors. Kinda weird. So I deleted it.

I forgot

I forgot to pray at a certain time yesterday. We were gone all day and I didn't switch on my computer till we came home. My reminders are there. How could I forget? How could I forget. How could I forget. I feel so bad. I prayed before and after, but I wanted to pray during. Instead, I was at the mall thinking about which color leggings to buy, pink or orange. I thought about myself all day. I don't know why. Usually I pray for someone, somebody, at some point during the day. It just happens. And I think of one, so I think of another. How could I have had such an empty prayer day all day. What am I made of. What happened with my mind. This is the worst prayer time incident ever. I could just cry. I already did. Sigh. It didn't help.

Photos

A small selection of pics I took last summer. I thought none of them very good at the time. I think they're kind of good tonight.

He is scratching his chin on the fence post and I thought it was the funniest thing! He was a friendly horse and I wasn't afraid of him.


A cropduster. Photo taken through our windshield. The plane flew right in front of us and was our bit of excitement for the day. I think he was showing off!


You'd never guess this peaceful setting is directly across the street from a bustling KOA Kampground in the great state of New York. Although, we are against turnpikes.


One day a dragonfly sat down beside me.


Taken with my little camera (not my big one I mean), this was the most spectacular sunset of our entire stay at Devils Tower, Wyoming. I had not seen clouds like these before. They were almost like inside out clouds or something. I thought they were rather ominous looking. See the sign next to the road. That's actually a turnout and the whole area is the prairie dog town. I spent many hours right here along this road. I went in the cool of the morning and again in late afternoon. Midday was sweltering, boiling, burning hot.

Transferring data and sword dancing

I'm transferring photos to CD so my husband can have this laptop. I don't like this job. I hate it. It's administrative - keeping organized and what not. On the up side, with some time separating me from the moment I took the photos I have a fresher eye to divvy up the keepers from the not keepers.

I've been real sleepy this week-end.

Did you see the glorious moonrise on Friday night? It was lovely. Its light reflected off of the lake so prettily. And today there were a lot of sailboats on the lake.

On Friday night I was flyin' after bellydance. No one else came to intermediate class which meant basically, I had my own one-on-one dance class! I told my teacher I have long wanted to learn sword dancing as a specialty and she said, "I have my sword in the car. I'll go get it." Whoa! I had so much fun. I danced with it balanced on my head. When you get better you can balance it on your tummy and your chest too. You need to have excellent control over your isolations, and I do. Your head must remain quite still whilest the rest of you dances. And you dance slooow. That's just my speed. lol! I can shimmy with it on my head too though!

So she gave me lots of pointers and I did it four or five times. She showed me how when you enter the stage you walk in a circle to claim your space and you should think of it as an opalescent bubble and you own it. I decided to make my bubble glowing magenta in my mind, but I didn't tell her that. She said it's important to do this so you aren't distracted by any negative energy from the audience and so people know they aren't allowed in your space while you dance. An example of negative energy is when one time my other dance teacher was up to dance. Right before her music started there was some raucous laughter in the restaurant and someone made a loud comment. Now maybe they were talking about something else completely, but I think they were being mean. This could be hard on a dancer.

Okay. The other thing is, respect the sword. They aren't sharp, but they can be heavy and they're still dangerous. You won't be wanting to drop it on your toe or anybody else's toe. It's a prop but you must give it respect and be very showy to make the audience think it's rather dangerous and build up the suspense. Do some flourishes with it, etcetera. Don't just walk up to it and plop it atop your head, um, like I did the first time. You can use some music up just getting the mood set. If you've seen sword dancing it's often done with a turban on the head. Dancers know this way is easier because you can fit the sword in a crease of the fabric. It still requires good balance but the turban provides a bit of confidence. If you're outside even a wind can move the sword. We have a fan in the studio and I noticed it moved my sword. I told my teacher I intended to do it with a turban and she said I ought to practice with it just on my head and that if I can do it just on my head, on my hair, it is known to be more difficult and thus, more impressive to other dancers. Well, naturally a dancer wants to impress other dancers. Ha!

I'm so out of shape. I need more stamina. I rode my bike a couple miles today and I was pooped. Sheesh.

Here is a YouTube example of a sword dance. This one is beautiful in its simplicity. There's another vid of a girl who does floorwork, but I'll put it up another time. In practice, I was able to get down to my knees but couldn't quite get up without the sword tipping. These ladies are Irish. Yeah man, bellydance is in Ireland! My costume is tribal as theirs are, but mine does not show any tummy. You can be covered and still be, I think, exceedingly beautiful. The costume is exceedingly beautiful, I mean.